Gaga and Perry

  

There isn't much to say about them really. They are not bad. Well not according to the popular standards set these days. They are not good either. I'd call them mediocre. Uninteresting. Not even worth talking about. Gaga is being Gaga,  and Perry... Well she's trying to be cute. As always.
    Overall the two hold so little relevance to me, and I don't really have any words to offer.

 But then why am I talking about them you might ask.






    Well first its because of the promoting.
    I mean it's not as if these two didn't already have the American pop scene, so radios going at lengths to promote them would seem redundant. No? Yet that's all they did.
    About a month ago, just as the summer was rolling towards its end, and around the time the songs came out, the stations simply would not shut up about it. First it was two days of ranting about how the songs got leaked a week too early. Well guess what? I don't care.
    Then it was the charts, and the votes and all that crap that went on and on for days.

    So what I'd like to know is, why the hell did they feel the need to hype these songs as if they are some newfound miracle that also cures cancer?

Did they finally realize the low quality of the pop industry and gasped: "My god! Are people really going to buy this garbage?" Well guess what, they are buying it anyway, of course they are, but that's besides the point.
    So yeah, the phenomena of the hype online and on the radio has baffled me. Though it still did not make the topic worthy enough to analyze or spend more mental power than what's needed for a snarky sneer.
    No.
    The real reason I'm writing all this for is kind of silly. It is a simple thought. A musing that came to me quite a while after I saw the Perry video. The lyric video, not the other thing... as ridiculously hilarious as it is.  (Also not that Destiny's Child didn't do it before. And I've got to love how she has working cell phone and all these things in the wilds. Yes, yes I know its supposed to be a metaphor or a parody or whatever, it still seems ridiculous to me.) 

    So yeah, I watched it, it was cutsy and all. Again not worthy enough to more than sneer at it. Then few nights after, just as I was falling asleep, I got to thinking about it again. So my brain did this little thing imagining it without the sound, and then I was looking at the pictures moving with the text messages and the cute emotes, where a trophy for some reason is read as "champion," and some weird eye references I would have never gotten, and I am like "Hold on, I've seen this shit before."
And indeed I have. 5000 years ago. Well on artifacts and writing systems from 5000 or more years ago.

Why yes, that is Egyptian Hieroglyphic, Mayan and the evolution of Cunei Form in a slide.

Though its not really fair to compare these scripts to "text language" as they are, technically, more complex.

So, the question I came to ask myself is, why, after thousands of years of lingual evolution, are we going back to the roots of all language in so called text speech. I mean wasn't it bad enough when we butchered the tongue with all the "shortification" of words like you to u and you're to ur? We looked that over since we had limited symbol count and stuff, but then it went on the internet, where it saves nothing but maybe, possibly, if we squint, a few seconds of writing. And then in schools and on paper writings of essays, or so I've heard legends.




And now? I look at the Perry song. This? We return to the forms of ancient language? Why? Why when we have the rich variety of nouns and adjectives and I don't know, verbs maybe. When our language has finally evolved enough to attempt to outline abstract ideas in detail and succeed to an extent? When it can clearly and easily define or describe a thing or event without needing a story teller or a courier to translate and elaborate? Is this a sign of some lingual devolution, or are we simply growing too lazy to think and even less explain ourselves in actual words?

Drake ft. Rihanna - Take Care

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     Well... It's been a while... Again. Crazy, crazy year.




   This time, just because I am kind of tired of ranting about everything, all the time, I decided to pick something nice to talk about. So, ladies and gentlemen, today I shall be presenting you: Drake ft. Rihanna - Take Care  

    Lets jump right in, and talk about the video clip. 

    The colours, the images, their movement and arrangement, it's all beautiful. Simplistic, yet beautiful, especially the movement. I know that most of the symbolism, if any, eludes me, but the way the sound and visuals combine is pretty.  It is also emotionally charged. Looking at the two performers, their positions, motions, gestures, expressions, how the camera zooms in and out, and that secret look Rihanna gives us, we can feel it, we can really see their emotions. I also feel the need to praise the choreography. It might seem simple at first glance, but the fluidity of motion, the movements that compliment the emotion of the song, that is not easy to pull off.


    The music is also beautiful. The eerie sound of the piano and the guitar create a unique atmosphere, a calm and relaxed feeling, few club songs can impose. Furthermore the combination between the visuals and the music is stunning. For example towards the end when the tone and melody change, the image of fire flashes, then we get the scene with the bull and the arrows. As the tone changes, becomes somewhat more urgent, more tense, so do the visuals, becoming a little bit more rapid, more threatening.

    And now to, perhaps my favourite part: the lyrics. They actually mean something. Can you believe it? There was thinking process behind the combination of words in a song. What sorcery is this? Have we reached a new stage in our evolution? God I hope so, even if some other examples of modern media cause me to seriously doubt that.
     True, some of the lyrics were sampled. Still, the combination, execution and composition are good. Furthermore, the people seem to like the song. Not that the majority particularly care or notice the lyrics, but, still, it's nice to know the masses like something decent for once.
    So what do the lyrics actually tell us? Do they really paint us a picture?

    Yes, they do.


    Amazing isn't it? The tale is of a troubled, complicated love story, between two people who clearly care about each other, but need to go over some inner turmoil before they are able to have a real, healthy relationship. And they are willing to take the steps.

    But that is my general reading. Lyrics can be read in many, more detailed, ways depending on the viewer, and that precisely is the beauty of good lyrics.
    Overall, it's a gentle and thoughtful song. What I like most about it is the performers, and especially Rihanna who has been looking particularly blank eyed and robotic in most of her recent songs. I mean, really, is this the expression of someone who is thrilled to have found the love of their life? ->

In Take Care you can really feel the emotion in her voice, really see it on her face. It resonates with the song. That's how singers, dedicated to their craft, should be. If they really are invested in their craft, it will show. Even if its just acting. It is still effort.
    Granted, the song samples/borrows from an older, original, song (by Bobby Bland), and its remix (by Jamie xx), but I think, the composition of this one is much better. The way the music compliments the voices, and how the instruments are executed and combine is much more fluid and melodic.
In the end, I still find it kind of funny. How a lot of modern pop songs often sample, borrow or are remakes from older songs... I do hope creativity can pick itself up rather than remaking things from the past, even if it has decades of innovations and greatness to surpass.

    Take Care did not become as popular for as long and was not as marketed as some other chart songs out there, but it was still pretty high up. So then, now that we have proven it can be done, why can't pop songs be more like this? What is their excuse?
   
    What excuses: Robin Thicke ft. T.I., Pharrell - Blurred Lines  or its unrated version?

I just love how bothered and uncomfortable they look, don't you?

    Whatever they paid those models... It really wasn't worth it.

So lets pray, the future brings us more of Take Care and less of Blurred Lines.
And finally, just for laughs because I found this reverse hilarious, enjoy: Sexy Boys, Parody by Mod Carousel 

Hispano Madness

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So... Hello again.

 [A foreword: this is going to be more ranty and less analytical. Yes, believe it or not I have been trying to actually analyze not just rant. In this case I just don’t think such brainless works of “art” deserve me utilizing the intellectual power for something other than ranting.]

Initially I thought my next post to be on a book, but in the spirit of the dying summer, yes it's over believe it or not, I decided to cover a topic brought to me by a friend. A friend who lives on the other side of the world, yet we both seem to have noticed a rather curious plague spreading through the the radio stations… Hispanic disco songs.

 Everybody seems to go wild about them. Would they be playing so often and for so long else? The reason why someone would constantly request this... I simply cannot picture. The lyrics I don’t get, even with a translation… I mean I understand what they sing, I just don’t get it. Most songs in that genre seem to be singing mostly about dancing drinking and getting laid. And that revelation received only after a careful dissection because the structure and "sentences" quite often don't make any sense. Still, nothing new here. Hispanic songs are about drinking, dancing and sex, and American songs are about drinking, dancing and sex. I guess that's just what the people want in their music/culture.

 The melody, again it’s the same every time. One or sometimes two beats repeated over and over until the melody is so deeply beaten into your brain you want to find a zombie and have it eat it to rid you of this torturous existence. But joking aside, they all seem to sound exactly the same as any other mindless disco songs out there.

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But let’s get to the actual songs I wish to mention. To be fair they never really got high in the charts around here (higher in Europe) but every time I turned on the radio, entered a store, or went any place public with music, I would hear them at least 2 times. Thus here they are, the top three most annoying Hispanic songs this summer has to offer according to my aching brain and my annoyed friend.

Number one spot, no doubt, goes to Tacabro – Tacata

Well technically Tacabro is an Italian band but with a Cuban singer so they sing in Spanish and I will brand them Hispanic. In terms of melody and lyrics, as you might guess, this is horridly repetitious and mind crushingly annoying. It is easily the song I dreaded most, instantly reaching for my phone and headphones whenever I was unable to make it stop. The problem is: it’s catchy, and crappy, very, very, very crapy. Listening to it just once will make you sing tacata, tacata, etc, inside your head for eternity.

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When I first heard this song it reminded me of something but it was so vague I couldn’t make sense of it. It was when I did my research that I finally realized what that initial feeling of familiarity was. Paco Paco – Taka-Takata. True it has nothing in common other than those annoying "words" but it’s still worth mentioning. Especially when the original was quite the hit back in its days and definitely better than this crap released today. An honorary mention for Joe Dassin’s version too, which I had actually heard before and was the source of that uncanny familiarity I felt. I couldn’t find more information on those two on the net so I apologize for that.
Inexplicably, the two old songs can’t manage to annoy me, at all even, although they too contain the “taka” thingy.


 Oh I get it, I think! They have other words in them and the singer’s voice is actually nice.

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Finally, I felt asudden need to comment on the video… As far as my research went there are 2 video clips for this song. Both I find obnoxiously slutty, and seizure inducing with their blinking light, swirling colour horridness. And here I ignore the cheap looks, kindergarten editing, and god awful choreography, if it can be called such.
As a last commentary I say to the producers: for god sake have some bloody decency, you could have bought the girls a swimsuit or something not make them dance in what looks like their underwear!

But moving on.



Number two: Michel Telo - Ai Se Eu Te Pego  

The Pitbull edition because that’s the one that was popular around here… Do I really need to say anything else? At least he brings in some diversity to the monotonous original song. Wait… No he doesn’t.

Uh all right, I will add to this. Why I don’t like this particular song isn’t that much the repeatedness, although it is one of the reasons. No, I hate it because of Michel Telo’s voice. I cannot begin to comprehend why he became such a sensation when throughout the whole song all I hear is whine, whine, whine; whine, whiiiiiine. Seriously listen to it, it’s like the most annoying sound I have ever heard coming out of a man’s mouth. It’s even worse than Bruno Mars, and god do I hate Bruno Mars’ girly voice strings.

It’s truly sad when the moment these songs come on it makes me wish I was listening to Katy Perry’s Wide Awake instead. Hell, I’d even take Nicki Minaj’s Starships anytime.

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And Number Three:  Willy William feat Lylloo - Baila

This song actually came out around the end of last year, but I am mentioning it here because its popularity reached its zenith this summer.

To be truthful I don’t find it particularly bad, I’d even dance to it in club, if I danced that is. Music and lyric-wise it’s just like all the other mediocre disco crap out there. What I find particularly appalling is… it’s just too noisy. I attribute that to the annoying female singer who won’t stop squealing her lines through the whole thing. How old is she anyway? 12? Or is she on helium or something. Seriously, is it just me, or does she sing kind of like a chipmunk?

Last I wanted to talk about one final Hispanic performer who became quite big this summer. Don Omar. There are two songs I wish to mention - Hasta Que Salga El Sol and Danza Kuduro

Again I don’t find them particularly bad or annoying or anything, really I’m neutral about it but when they just wont stop bloody playing them... Eesh...
Anyhow, it's the same type of lyrics, dance till you die, drink a beer, have fun, lather, rinse, repeat. In both songs there was something about hips. Actually a lot about hips, so I am beginning to think he might have some fetish about it.

They even got their girls some swimsuits!

 Else on the clip of Danza Kudro, it's the same boring crap of men jerking their hands in the air and women in scanty clothes lounging around. It's better produced that Tacata, definitely, but I attribute that to the bigger budget.

Seriously though isn’t there something else that could be playing on the radio instead? I know there must be, so cut it out with the endless hispanics and give me some variety.

That’s what I thought, and well I got my wish... They now play Flo Rida – Whistle…

And about that…
I...
Um...
Well...
Just…

No. Just no!

There. I am out of words. Happy crappy pop song?

In any case I doubt I could have added anything to what Todd in the Shadows already said. Here, watch his review(s) and support the struggle against crappy pop music.

(And yes, I know Whistle is not Hispanic but I thought it deserved some hatred.)

As for anything I could have said about it, here let me illustrate it with another pony.